Do you want to improve your self-esteem? If so, look inside rather than outside of the self. When it comes to self-esteem it has everything to do with our relationship to our self. We can blame others or get lost in a world of denial, but ultimately each individual has to take responsibility. If you want to build self esteem remember the following three steps:
1) Take care of your body. Exercise, eat well, and take care of you.
2) Be positive. Focus on your strengths and let the positive voice shine through.
3) Set goals. Once you have one and two down it is time to start thinking about what wonderful you wants to accomplish. Without goals it is possible to revert back to previous low levels of self esteem.
Accepting Responsibility for Your Self Esteem
Tuesday, June 9, 2015
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Staying in Control of Self Esteem
Yes, you have control over what you think. The last thing any of us needs is to be bullied. Life is hard enough as it is, but what happen when the bully is inside our own mind? When thought turn to the negative, the anxious, and become an attack on the self it is time to say STOP! We do not have to let negative thoughts control our emotions and our life. Re-framing negative thoughts and changing our choice of words can go a long way toward building self-esteem.
Stop Putting Yourself Down and Build Self Esteem
Stop Putting Yourself Down and Build Self Esteem
Wednesday, April 22, 2015
Conflict Resolution and The Impasse
Most arguments end prior to a completely successful resolution. They
usually end at a place called the impasse, where each party sees no
resolution in sight. It is at this juncture that frustration sets in,
anger often escalates, and the argument becomes a fight.
The impasse is perhaps the most difficult aspect of an argument to control. Most people approach their differences “nose to nose,” in other words as adversaries competing for what they want. The impasse looks to them like an unsolvable rift be it in wants, needs, perceptions of who is right or wrong, etc. They give up out of frustration and either resign themselves to unhappiness or begin to plan how they can get what they want without the cooperation of the other. Even after the anger subsides, a false peace may be achieved but unless the issue has been truly resolved it is destined to rear its ugly head at some later point with the combined force of both the past upset and the present.
The key to resolving the impasse is to go from being nose to nose to sitting shoulder to shoulder, viewing your differences as a problem that must be solved. Put the problem in front of the two of you with the conviction that it is unacceptable to walk away from it until the two of you have figured out a mutually good enough resolution.
Remember, be it a spouse, a friend, co-worker, if you win an argument, if you get your way, you now have to live with the loser. We all know how we feel when we lose at something; defeated, bitter, frustrated, possibly even vengeful! Do you really want to live with that person? Besides, in many cases the person we are arguing with is someone we care about or love. We should care about their needs and wants getting met as much as our own and demonstrate it in our words and actions.
The concept of the Win-Win solution is that whatever final agreement or resolution is reached, it must feel genuinely good enough to both parties! Always approach an argument with the conviction that it isn’t over until both of you are feeling good about the solution. And if all else fails, consider if it is in your best interest to be right and come out the winner, or to happy.
The impasse is perhaps the most difficult aspect of an argument to control. Most people approach their differences “nose to nose,” in other words as adversaries competing for what they want. The impasse looks to them like an unsolvable rift be it in wants, needs, perceptions of who is right or wrong, etc. They give up out of frustration and either resign themselves to unhappiness or begin to plan how they can get what they want without the cooperation of the other. Even after the anger subsides, a false peace may be achieved but unless the issue has been truly resolved it is destined to rear its ugly head at some later point with the combined force of both the past upset and the present.
The key to resolving the impasse is to go from being nose to nose to sitting shoulder to shoulder, viewing your differences as a problem that must be solved. Put the problem in front of the two of you with the conviction that it is unacceptable to walk away from it until the two of you have figured out a mutually good enough resolution.
Remember, be it a spouse, a friend, co-worker, if you win an argument, if you get your way, you now have to live with the loser. We all know how we feel when we lose at something; defeated, bitter, frustrated, possibly even vengeful! Do you really want to live with that person? Besides, in many cases the person we are arguing with is someone we care about or love. We should care about their needs and wants getting met as much as our own and demonstrate it in our words and actions.
The concept of the Win-Win solution is that whatever final agreement or resolution is reached, it must feel genuinely good enough to both parties! Always approach an argument with the conviction that it isn’t over until both of you are feeling good about the solution. And if all else fails, consider if it is in your best interest to be right and come out the winner, or to happy.
How to Build Self-Esteem Through Exercise
Love it! I was just speaking to someone the other day about the many benefits of exercise from helping with depression to self-esteem. Exercise is about feeling better both physically and mentally. In fact, when I am not feeling well the new question I ask myself is, "what is going to make me feel better right now?" This is a great way to focus on what is good for you and walk away from the pitfalls of destructive behavior.
How to Build Self-Esteem Through Exercise
How to Build Self-Esteem Through Exercise
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